The Window of Tolerance

The Window of Tolerance is a tool we use to learn about our zones of dysregulation and how we can use grounding to get ourselves back in the present moment. Everyone has a “window of tolerance”, the zone in which we feel we’re able to manage the ups and downs we experience in daily life. This zone does not mean everything is perfect, we can still feel the entire range of emotions, but we feel present in the moment and able to manage.

 Everyone has a different sized window of tolerance- going through traumatic and difficult experiences can “shrink” our window so that things we may have previously been okay with might make us feel bigger emotions (navigating new triggers, etc.). However, through grounding and other healing work we can grow our window of tolerance as well!

When we dysregulate into “hyperarousal”, that’s when we experience intense feelings of anger, anxiety, fear, etc. We might feel incredibly heightened, like we are ready to burst at any moment. On the other end, we may dysregulate into “hypoarousal”, when we experience intense feelings of sadness, depression, and apathy, often feeling numb and lacking motivation. When we notice ourselves feeling dysregulated and feeling like we might be moving into hypo- or hyperarousal, that’s when we want to use grounding tools to bring us back to the present and back within our window of tolerance! 

Remember, we aren’t getting rid of our emotions and we’re not getting rid of the hard stuff, but we’re bringing ourselves back to the present so we can better manage those emotions and reach out for support. It can be hard to focus or know what to do/what we want when we’re at either end of the spectrum, so getting as close to the middle as we can might even just help us have a moment to think, breathe, and plan out what we need next in the moment to feel okay.